New Year's Resolutions

I went to work out and was asked to write down a New Year's resolution. I realized I don't have any! Its because I'm perfect. I'll wait patiently as the dear reader snorts. Seriously, I find nothing grievous enough to resolve on it. I wrote down "Eat more vegetables". That's true. I have to eat my veggies.

Also, I need to get a proper storage system for my yarn and UFOs. A series of shopping bags in the closet isn't really working out. But does that count as a resolution? I was going to do that anyway.

There's also maintaining a budget. That's a hard one. Its 1/2 the reason my stash is overflowing the closet again. I've tried that resolution before to limited success. I've noted some talk about a yarn resolution, but I'm not going to bother pretending. There's no way I'll make it. Why start off the New Year with a rousing defeat?

Anyone else think New Year's is lame? Everybody's expected to party lavishly and I'm dragging myself to a party I have no desire to attend out of sheer politics. It will be rude if I don't go to your lame party. And of course people insist on throwing parties and I don't have a ready list of excuses.

Top 5 Excuses for not Attending Your New Year's Party

1. I find you quite noxious.
2. Your last party bored me to sobs.
3. Its too far away.
4. I don't have an outfit.
5. I'd rather keep the alcohol I'm bringing to your party.

I guess none of these excuses, while true, will fly.

Holiday Aftermath

I finished my Red Scarf Project scarf. It's brown. It actually turned out really well. It's rare that I am happy about a completed object. It's currently waiting blocking then it's ready to go. I'll post an old photo in the meantime.

I will be making one of these babies for myself. I'll probably adapt the pattern a little bit to make it narrower. And I'm going to try and devise a matching hat eventually.

I suppose I should've wished people happy holidays. For me the whole slew of affairs was more stressful than anything else. I had to clean and put up the decor. And wrap presents. And furiously finish up my brother's wimple. Photo to come. I had just finished showering when the fam showed up and promptly ejected me from the bathroom because Dad had to pee. Not exactly holiday cheer.

My brother claimed to like the fingerless gloves, but he left them at my house. I said nothing, but I loaded them into the car to see if he'd notice them. He did. He picked them up and left them under the seat. Forget it. I'm done. He can't have the mitts anymore; they clearly won't be in good hands.

Pretending like I was a good Christmas domestic, I also tried Aidan's cookies, but I didn't make it to the store before Christmas. I HATE THAT! Everyone I called was hungry and bored and everything was closed except the movies. I had to improvise with the chocolate. The dough ended up looking a bit like indigestibles. The end result was edible, but I'll have to try again. Christmas baking, nay any culinary attempt, is not my forte.

PUFO

I've had this UFO for about a year and it seems that it's become a PUFO, permanently unfinished object. The yarn has been discontinued from the place I bought it and I'm too lazy to look for it elsewhere.

So now I'm back to the drawing board. What is going to happen to this extra bulky yarn? I feel a bit defeated actually. I've only had one other PUFO before. Is there another acronym for this state of affairs? PUFO sounds like a celebrity pet dog name.

In the meantime I signed up for a knitting class and I decided that it's a masochistic tendency. A knitting class is a place where you actually pay people to watch your knitting mistakes in action. Here I was formally making ugly mistakes in private for free. Oh well, I hope it helps.

Countdown

There's nothing like the holidays to ensure that you get nothing done. The clock is ticking for me because the brother gets his present on Friday and the present is not finished. I spent awhile this weekend pleading with my yarn. You see, I'm using stash yarn and I realized that I was about to run out. I evoked a yarn prayer.

Pleeeeeese don't run out yarn! I swear I won't scoff at your price tag when I see you at the yarn store. I promise I won't purchase you and then leave you among the dust bunnies in the closet for years at a time. Someday I'll treat you to a swift and ball winder so that you don't roll away and hide under the couch or coffee table in your hand-wound shame.

It didn't work. I ran out of yarn. So after a few futile attempts pretending to finish the piece with the lacking yarn, I finally ripped back and will have to add yarn of another color. Three more days and no time. Blast!

Bah Humbug

I hate the holidays. They are overly romanticized like prom night in movies and men in general. This year I have done nada and feel guilty. I managed to move the decorations out of the basement. The end.

Nevertheless there is one tradition I have maintained with flying colors this year. I call it the "one for you, one for me" tradition. This is how it works: you go shopping, you get someone on your list a present, and you get yourself a present. The Christmas magic glows.

So far, I have long underwear for a grandma, long underwear shirt for me. Christmas socks and headband for gift exchange, Christmas socks and headband for me. Jeans for brother, shoes for me. Book for the boy, Knit 2 Together for me.

Nevermind, maybe the holidays aren't so bad after all.

Wimple Finished

After some frogging, the wimple is finished!

Here are the wimple details for all those other wimple experimenters out there. The wimple needs to go around your head so the circumference should match accordingly. I actually had to take my glasses off to put this wimple on, but I like the tightness. I made this wimple 23 inches around.

The benefit of a wimple is that it's not only a neck warmer; you can also pull it up around your nose for those single digit cold days. From cast on to increase, my wimple is 10 inches. At first I thought that it was too long because it bunches a bit around the neck, but it works beautifully for pulling the wimple up. The original pattern I used called for 14 inches, thus the frogging. I didn't like that length at all. I don't have a periscope neck.

I don't know what to say about my increases. I liked the pattern the increases were making so I kept going, but it's a bit ruffle-y. I increased every 5 stitches for two inches and then I added two more inches to that. I think most wimples should allow for more shoulder space and a more gradual increase, but I tried this wimple on under all of my coats and found that it was long enough.

Is there a wimple KAL anywhere? I've ripped up my brother's hat and decided he needs a wimple instead.

Chic Knits Advice

On Sunday, a local knitting store invited Bonne Marie of Chic Knits to talk about garment design. This was a really great event for anyone making tops. We paired up and got our definitive measurements. (A humbling experience.) Then we jotted all this info down for safekeeping. Bonne Marie also gave us the idea of keeping a few favorite pieces about to check sizing. So say your bust measurements are XX (no damming figures). And say that your favorite sweater really measures XX+3. If you're making a new sweater in the style of your favorite, you should consider those proportions while working with your pattern. We got another worksheet to take the measurements of our favorite clothes for safekeeping.

The whole thing reminded me of a marathon. While you're standing around cheering for the event you think, I can do this! But are you really going to train for those 26 miles? Thus is my debate with making a sweater. I'd love to make a sweater. In fact, I've got pieces of a sweater lying around from 15 years ago. Someday. In the meantime I'm all about instant gratification. I spend enough time ripping up simple hats. However, when the day comes and I'm ready to attack the sweater, I've got all these great ideas and resources. The pattern I was interested in evaporated into thin air, but when the day comes, I have a pattern I'd like to try as well.

Oh yea. And I bought a lot of yarn.

Museum of Contemporary Arts

Sometimes you have to forget about the 3 million other jerks living in Chicago and appreciate the city. Last year someone had the brilliant idea of hosting a monthly stitch 'n bitch at the Museum of Contemporary Art. I never attended for I was certain I'd run into those knitters that redefine scientific principles via their complicated knitting. I was wrong. The knitters weren't so intimidating.

I didn't get a chance to poke around and see all the knitting because I was so busy catching up with other south side knitters. We are all starved for love and attention. I also met Linda who supported my phobia of coming home to find your parents unexpectedly sitting in your house. It happens! Not only was she a victim, her parents arrived unexpectedly from China. If your parents are the type to break into your house, they’ll cross continents!

The evening involved at least 30 knitters in the lovely museum cafe complete with a participatory knitting art installation. I heard it resembled an octopus. I was pleased.

A Couple of Mitts

The fingerless mitts (gloves) are complete! One day I'll figure out the lighting and photography thing. I'm not too pleased with the handiwork, but I doubt the brother will notice. Sadly, the acrylic version of the mitts knit up much nicer.

They did not go to waste for I made the boy a Christmas present. I call it the rock 'n roll mitt. He'll have the perfect accessory at a rock concert. Or in the event that he has a frat boy moment (I hope not.) he could don the glove and utter one of those "YEAH! WOO!"s. Now he can quit bitching that I haven't knit him anything although he's likely to recognize this as my brother's hand-me-down.

The mitts (gloves) pattern came from "Weekend Knitting" by Melanie Falick. A lovely book. I tried the butter cookies too, but I think they gave me gas.

Winter Stuff

I put winter out of my memory. Really. I was actually looking forward to it. I had completely forgotten what happens when the temperature drops 40 degrees in a matter of hours.

What happens? Your car freezes shut. Your battery dies. As you're walking you note that the slush forms into treacherous ice passages. You rely on light posts and gates for safe passage. I'm a fast walker and I was getting on my own nerves treading gingerly over the slick peaks and crevices. Thus far, I've remained on two feet. Anyone want to get me cleats for Christmas?

I had enough time to rip up some knitting this weekend, but that's about it. My brother's fingerless mitts went from 3 fingers back to 1 finger. My wimple looks funny. (I got increase happy and it looks more like a pleated skirt than a mock turtleneck.)

However, I did make it over to Urban Outfitters for some Christmas shopping and I was quite inspired. I'm into the scarves with pockets. I'll be stuffing the pockets with some heating pads. And they had some nice man-hats. My brother's the only one goofy enough to wear them, but he'll be a good model if he continues to behave himself. As for the slippers, I'll pronounce a big, "Yea Right!" but I like them and I'm sure someone else is capable of making them by hand.